Unemployement Awaits

"I don't want to get off this plane..." I knew that the second I stepped out, I would be all alone in a strange place. Hours went by, as I explained to the passenger next to me the motives behind my decision to work and live in Japan for a year. She didn't quite understand. I didn't either, but the feeling of the unknown excited me and scared me at the same time. As the plane approached the ground 12 hours after leaving everything I had ever known, I took a deep breath and tried to reassure myself. I've had gone this far. There was no way back. There was no time for regrets. I needed to get prepared for the consequences of my decision. I grabbed my bags and made my way out of the plane to feel the hot humid air that had the smell of tribulation and opportunity.

Its been a year today since I was first walking the streets of my new neighbourhood. I clearly remember wondering if I would ever be capable of getting through a year in a place that felt so distant from home. I never thought I would say this, but I feel comfortable here and the thought of coming back home is scarier than what I felt a year ago in that airplane.

I extended my contract with Agora and I'll be back in Canada on December 6th, in time to celebrate Christmas with my family. I was lucky to be able to work for a private company that allowed me to extend for any period of time. I know that if I extended any longer, it would be even harder get back home. I have a life here, a job and great friends. There is no reason for me to come back, but this experience has given me the confidence to do something greater with my life and that "something" won't be in Japan. So the big plan is to come back home, sit on my mom's couch for a month and relax, then visit friends and family around the holiday season. In January, I'm starting school at Ryerson and hopefully by the end of the session I will have a job. If not, im travelling through Europe to see Heidi in Spain and Diane in England.

This is all I've got for now. I will try and write more at a later time. It's been a long time since my last posting. I hope everyone is doing well!

I'm now going to the center of town to purchase my plane ticket to Canada.

e.

Too little, too late? Opt for a second chance..

Hello everyone!!

remember me?

maybe you do from the last entry in this blog I wrote almost 2 months ago... shame on me.

But between having internet troubles, my brother and my mother coming, a new roomate and all the travelling, I hope y'all can understand that I didn't have time to update this blog much. So many things have been happening and I really dont know where to begin, so I thought of compilling all of my best pictures of where I have been and what I have seen in the last 2 months... starting with when my brother was in Japan.

Here goes...

My brother came at the end of April, right in time for Cherry Blossom season (yes , I know that I stopped writing my blog weeks before the last week of April. Just don't tell anyone.) My brother went wild going around Fukushima and capturing the best sceneries framed by the beautiful trees.

On his first day of jet lag, he joined me at school with my kindergarten class and saw how precious my kids were. It was strange to have him at work with me and have him see me interact with the kids. I feel like I have gone such a long way, from not knowing what the hell I was doing to actually having complete control.

Merely a few hours after arriving in Fukushima, Jordan and I ventured on our first week-end in Tokyo together. Saturday was reserved for traditional Tokyo where we visited the Senso-ji temple in Asakusa and lounged the Sumida river. Then later that night we partied for the very first time together on Roppongi... end of story.

This is only my first entry of many, since I have to pause now and get ready for work, but I promise to continue updating. Please don't give up on me!

lots of love and kisses, e.

Sending out an S.O.S.

We are the luckiest people on earth, yet we take so much for granted. I am the first one to admit it. Personally, I feel like I have with my family, my friends and their gratuitus acts that I never really questionned. What they did for me always seemed normal. Just say thank you, and everything is all good.

I have just watched two incredible films, The Constant Gardener and Hotel Rwanda, and it reminded me that there are many people who don't even get the opportunity to say thank you. Most of this world's population can't count on anyone and has no choice but to fight for themselves on their own. In many countries, all they want is to live.. is that so much to ask for?

Sure it's easy to sound concerned and it is so easy to discuss about the world's inequalities... I am not the only one to feel this way, but have we done anything? It is easier said then done, but for now let's do what we can with the people around us: become a supportive ear, give without expecting anything in return, smile to the people around you, make them feel worthy. This is such a small step to what the rest of the world really need, but it is also these little things that pay off at the end.

I really wish I could make a difference, and maybe we all are in a way. We just can't forget of the ones that need the most help. I would love to give a hand where it is the most needed... I am tired of being one of these people who say "that is too bad," turn off their TV sets and go have dinner as if nothing happened. Sadly enough, there are so many worthy causes out there, so many to choose from, so many people in need. It can't be that hard to make a bigger difference. Anyone game?

Precious Little Things

I have never imagined that one day I would work with children, become their teacher or their mentor. I never thought I had it in me. I knew about other people who did it as a living, but I never really was interested in doing their jobs or know about it. It always sounded like hard work, a stressful and messy job. Having snot all over my shirt, or getting sick every few weeks, just didnt seem like much fun. I also couldnt imagine myself being on all fours playing with ABC blocs with children and reading them Goldilocks and the Three Bears . That is what stressed me the most before starting this job. I have always known myself to be a tolerant and patient person, and I knew that this experience would challenge these qualities and it has. It is a hard job, but surprisingly enough these kids have also been the best part of my Japanese experience.

This job is not easy. I have to be at work by 8:45 to greet my kindergarten kids with a big smile and a heartfelt "Good morning." I am not a terrible morning person, but it is not like I feel like beeing bubbly and peppy every morning. I have to play with these kids and have small talks with them all in English until the "morning circle", where the teacher in charge gives a little 30 minute lesson. The lesson usually consists of the ABCs, numbers, weather, months, days of the week, colours, body parts, I teach them a little French, we sing songs, we dance with them... its like giving a little performance everyday. Of course, I have my off days when I just can't get them to focus or get them to listen. Anyway, no matter how difficult this job is, I can't start by explaining how precious these kids are. I knew they were great kids, but now I am really starting to get attached to them.

Their graduation is coming soon. 4 of them are moving on to elementary and some kids are deciding to switch to a Japanese kindergarten. I am really sad to see them leave. Even the ones that I didn't really like at first are now maybe the ones I don't want to see leaving the most. You know, the snotty, grabby, needy, naughty ones... they have grown on me and I have grown on them. The relationship I have with these kids is like nothing I have ever had before. I have seen them grow, evolve and mature a great deal in my first 6 months. They all have such great personalities and it is fun to think of the kinds of people they will become when they are all grown up. Many of them are extremly intelligent, some are sensitive, some need more attention then others and some are incredibly creative. They all have this special quality about them.

I think that it will be very hard when I leave and say goodbye to all of them. There is this one little girl and her name is Kano. She is 6 with the biggest heart. We have been practicing this song for graduation called "Thank You and Goodbye." It is all about being friends forever even though we have to say goodbye. The first time we practiced it, with her little English she just said "This is so sad," and started to cry. I couldnt believe how beautiful that was. This same little girl she always tells me how she likes me and others tell me "I look cool". I just love them so much, they are just so precious. Especially the boys that point to my breast and ask me "what is this?" and I answer, "a shirt silly!" Oh precious, they are.

When I started out, my mom told me that this could be good practice for when I have my own children... and well, although I am totally in love with these children, it still hasnt really convinced me on having my own. At first, I knew I wanted children and then I went through a phase of "what gives... I'll never meet anyone to give me kids anyway," and now I guess I am not all that interested in having my own and taking care of other people's kids is well enough for now. I guess you can never know for sure about these things. It will all come in time.

Anyway here are a few pictures of my kids:

And this is the kindergarten class:

Here are two pictures that I stole from the Agora website of me teaching my other classes with my elementary students.





So today is St Patrick's day and I am not doing much about it other then wearing green. I told my students about St Patrick's day without the mention of heavy partying and green beer. They were all excited when I asked who was wearing green and went all the way to showing me the green on their underwear to tell me that they were also celebrating St Patrick's day.

When I got home tonight, I put on my sweats and put on In America, about an Irish family starting their lives from scratch in New York City. A sort of modern day Angela's Ashes.... So that is how I celebrated St Patrick's day. Go Irish! It is impossible to fully celebrate western holidays in this country.

Now I am just killing time before going to Diane's for a French dinner. My boss got me a real French baguette from a bakery near his house and so we have been trying to build up a meal around the idea of the baguette. Diane is a great cook so I am sure it will all be good, topped with some french wine and pastries provided by your truly. Yes, I am hungry...

I don't quite know what I will be doing this week-end. I know that I am going to a birthday dinner tomorrow night for my friends Ayako and Keita. Its going to be a little pricy, but will be better then staying at home still breathing carosene fumes and wasting time browsing the net. Either way, its becoming a habit to go to a dinner party on saturday nights.

I am so hungry.

Please take care and think of the children. :)
love you all,
e.

What Not to Wear

Women in kimonos, men wearing glittery pink t-shirts, teenagers wearing their uniforms on sundays, extreme mini-skirts, hooker boots, mullets, fluffy hair accessories, long johns under skirts... Other than the traditional wear, fashion here is an eye soar! Although Japan is known to be ahead in the fashion world, they should have stuck with kimonos and wooden sandals. Almost every girl dresses like Britney Spears "Hit me Baby one More Time" circa, wear mini skirts at -10 tempatures and insists on permed mullets. Anyway, to be fashionable in Japan you need to be colour blind and trapped in the 80s.

I wouldnt call myself a fashion guru in any stretch of the word, but I have had to tone down my fashion not only for being a foreigner, but also for being a teacher. Not only can I not follow the fashion here, but I needed to put aside a few garments that I have learned not to wear in this country. There is an unwritten rule that low cut shirts and tank tops should not be worn. Even though I have never seen SO MANY mini-skirts, showing cleavage here is a definite no-no. I don't mind covering up, but I have had to put aside a few shirts that I couldnt even dare myself to wear anymore. I get enough attention already as it is, I wouldnt want to shock my neighbours with a (God forbid) tank top! I am happy I loaded up on t-shirts and hoodies at Roots, because that is all I have been wearing in the last 6 months.

I feel like a nun every morning when I get ready to go to work. Not that I used to dress like a total slut at home, but I miss the times I would feel really sexy sporting a new pink tank top with a new pair of earings. Here, I wear pearls with a grey turtle neck... nice. I want to feel like a girl again!

So why am I ranting about Japanese fashion and my sudden fashion turnover... well, one of my students told one of my teacher friends that Agora must be making a lot of business from men because of my low cut shirts. My what? Appearantly, the men that come to my English classes on Thursday mornings at the community center come to look at my cleavage. My what? Yes... appearantly, I have breasts. I have never seen them myself, but it would seem that my breasts have been helping my school making good business. Unless they have a lazer vision that let them see through my shirts, I cannot think of a single shirt I have worn at work that could show my perverted students any sort of cleavage.

Remember these wise words, "Lucky that my breasts are small and humble So you don't confuse them with mountains." I stand by Shakira with this, but now it seems that I could be a little bit more shapely then I thought. But is that really something you would like to hear after teaching these people for 6 months. I really didn't need to know this...

No but, honestly... my friend Michelle made it seem like a compliment, but to the contrary I feel totally degraded. To think that my student would actually say that to my friend and believe that my men students come to see the shirts I wear, doesnt exactly make me feel appreciated for being a good teacher. And trust me, I truly believe that my lessons are fun and interesting. I thought they came for my mind-opening lessons and not for the milimeter of skin that I show right below my neck. Are these men so desperate that an ounce of young skin is the only reason to come to my English lessons? I find it rude and demeaning and they can be sure that next week the snow suit will be coming out. Sorry Agora.

The February Blues

I turn on my laptop first thing every morning and set it to listen to my favourite radio station, 102.1 The Edge. Then I hear all of these wonderful concert announcements, some traffic and weather reports from this far off land that I call home. At first, this made me think of the incredible possiblities of technology, and how a simple radio station could so easily transport me to the most basic comforts of home. However, this simple form of escape has not cured me from my homesickness, but maybe made it worse. The bleak month of February is almost over and I hope that the upcoming weeks heading to Spring will make this feeling go away. I often look at maps in my school and travelling destinations on the Internet, and think of all the places I could be with this voice in my head saying "anywhere but here." I am only a few days away from accomplishing my first 6 months and although I feel very proud of this, I should maybe be telling myself "Shit, I only have 6 more months before facing the harsh reality of what I will be doing for the rest of my life." I know that once I go back home, maybe after making up for lost time with my friends and family, it will be time to seriously think about my future. So maybe I should start feeling blessed for being in Japan, not only because it is an experience that only a few people get to do, but also because it is giving me some time to think about these hard questions. But at the same time I am looking forward to start the rest of my life and that feeling is much stronger than wanting to stay in safe Japan for another year. There is a big world out there and it is time for something new.

Oh, look at Eve being so deep... bah...

And I hope that no one will get really offended by this, but the one thing, the one person, I miss the most is my mother. I keep on imagining going out and doing things with her and just talk. I have become so nostalgic living here and thinking back to when I was a little girl and the fun times I would have with my family, but especially with my mom. My only wish after work would be to go to this Greek restaurant on Danforth for some dinner, have a beer along with some greek appetizers and then finish off at this gelato parlour on Bathurst. Wouldn't that be great? as simple as this seems.

Anyway, I just didnt think I would feel homesick before leaving Canada. I am actually really surprised of feeling this way. I have lived away from home four years before. I never knew it would start here. I honestly didnt. But there are also some amazing things here in Japan that I should really consider and embrace. I shouldnt forget about all of the wonderful things this country has to offer me that I couldnt get in canada. Only good things are ahead. I know it.

For starters, Diane and I went to this beautiful place called Matsushima, just 2 hours north from Fukushima. It is considered one of three most beautiful views in Japan. It is along the ocean and is made up of over 200 pine-covered islands.

My girl, Diane and I on the train to Sendai. Just being with her alone is an awsome retreat, being with her in Matsushima was a delight.

Some oysters fishing boats facing the beautiful Matsushima sea.

The Godai-dou Hall, a wooden shrine that is only opened once every 33 years, next time being in 2006! Need to look into that.

Beautiful Matsushima.

House perched over a cliff facing Matsuhima. It must be quite the view all day everyday.

Mountains of empty oyster shells.

Savouring our oyster lunch with a bottle of Asahi beer.

The red bridge, view from the Godai-dou temple.

I like this picture I took from the steps of the shrine.

Man inducing Diane to try some cow tongue, "Mam, it is popular in Japan."

Plastic display of a cooked cow tongue.

The real deal... I tried it because I was basically given a piece as I was looking over what he was cooking. I wasnt even quite sure if it was cow tongue, but I have to say that it wasnt bad. A little chewy with a strange soft texture, but overall good tasting.

On our way back home we decided to stop in Sendai to have a few drinks, which turned into 2 bottles of wine and a meeting with this 50 year old American University teacher working in Japan for over 12 years. He was trying to convince us that Japanese people were racists. Maybe he should be a little bit more worried about the racism problems in his own country, before pointing the finger to Japanese people. It is just recently that Japan has opened its borders to other nationalities. After living in Japan for a few months, I know that people stare at you out of pure uncontrollable curiosity and not because they don't like you. If they do criticize foreigners that is because they have unfortunatly been meeting lousy foreigners, or simply because they havent been in contact with enough of us to really understand. They have nothing to be racist about, they dont know anything about us. I think there are 50 foreigners in Fukushima and I take no offence when people stare at me or say tiny little comments about me. I just thought all along that if Japan starts becoming racist, it would be because of people like him who is bringing these negative beliefs in such a peaceful nation. I think it would awake a needless debate and give the Japanese some ideas about a problem that doesnt even really exist. Its like putting fuel to a small fire. He is starting off a debate in a country that doesnt know how to deal with such an issue because, there you go: racism doesnt exist here.

The month of March is right around the corner and then before I know it it will be April. Yippee! My brother is coming, then my mom and Rachel will be living here with me until September. I think I am just tired of being alone and it will be nice to have some familiar faces here. I just cant wait to show them my Japanese world, my life here in Fukushima, my work and live some new japanese experiences with them.

Take care to all of you, I miss you and love you dearly! Just another 6 months before my return home.

e.

Tokyo Zoo

Flashy blinding neon lights, the sound of blaring music and sales people screaming out of their megaphones, people people people... and more people. Being in Tokyo for less then two days was enough for me to realize that I have been stuck in my small town of Fukushima for waaayyy too long. My ears were still ringing as I was getting off the 90 minute shinkansen ride. Why did I wait so long? And when is my next invitation?

At first, I was going to go to Tokyo by bus, because it was much cheaper. I have been trying very hard to save money for when my family comes to visit. However, I was too late to reserve my bus tickets and every bus was sold out. But after much persuasion from my friend Donna, I gave in and decided to leave on Saturday morning with her sister and her boyfriend who were visiting from Australia.

After spending $160 on a 2 day trip to Tokyo, this had to be worth it! The train ride was somewhat of a drag, since both Donna's sister, Becky, and her boyrfiend, Ben, were not the most exciting couple. I was also very surprised and dissapointed by the way they reacted when they initially stepped into the streets of Tokyo. They didn't seem impressed or interested one bit! Meanwhile, I didn't know where to look, I didn't know what to say, I was totally speechless and taken back by all the movement. I was utterly overwhelmed by everything that was happening around me.

Firstly, we had to find their hostel in Shinjuku from the Tokyo metro station. The over usage of arrows in Tokyo train stations would even give Magellan a hard time. I dont know how many times we had to walk in circles before finding the proper metro line. Finally on the subway, I was suprised by how empty the trains were. I always had this image of being shoved in and stuck in between people's smelly armpits. We all had an available seat and once we arrived to our metro destination I think we walked 1/4 accross the Tokyo undergroung system before getting to the proper exit. If people tell you Tokyo is big, please dont be stupid and tell them otherwise. It's like Toronto times eight!

So after dropping off their luggage we walked throughout Shinjuku and decided to go to Yoyogi park for a stroll. My travel book told me that it was an interesting young people hang-out place, but much to my dismay all we could see were old Japanese people taking their afternoon walks and tourists.

Although I was surprised by the serene and calm atmosphere of the park, I think it was a nice breather before diving back into the madness of Tokyo. At our exit, we had to cross this bridge towards Harajuku best known as the goth hang out place where you can find the famous Harajuku girls.

They are accustumed to pose for tourists. so here you are Heidi, your Harajuku girls. Usually there are appearantly more of them and more excentric looking ones, but I guess there was another gothic party elsewhere.

At this point we were headed towards Shibuya crossing, the most crossed intersection in the world! I was amazed to see so many foreigners and hear so much English. Even Japanese people were speaking English between each other. As we were getting closer and closer to Shibuya crossing, the intersections were getting bigger and bigger and more crowded. I was scared to lose Ben and Becky among the crowd. I felt like I was going to a Rolling Stones concert, but this was typical Tokyo. And then there it was, Shibuya crossing... the famous intersection that basically defines Japan in all its glory. It was there, right in front of me and I knew right then and there that I was in Japan. We decided to get a latte at the Starbucks facing the crossing and to go to the second floor to have a better view. It said we were not allowed to take pictures, but I took some anyway. Here are just a few I took incognito.

People waiting to cross...

People starting to cross...

Half-way there...

Largest human obstacle course...

I made it! Ouff!

After shopping in a few stores at Shibuya station it was time to make it back to the hostel and get ready for my big night out on Roppongi Hills.

We left for dinner after watching an hour of olympic curling between Canada and Japan, and some extreme Dodgeball without Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn. I had to meet Donna in Roppongi so we had dinner in that area, which is probably the most westernized location in Japan. It was so bizarre. It wasn't Japan, it wasn't America, it was like an international neutral ground where all countries united and partied together. I didnt know what to think, but I felt like I was on another planet away from everything I had ever known!

We went to this chinese restaurant with a promising atmosphere but with shitty food and shitty service. After dinner, we were pressured by these jamaican bouncers to have a cheap drink at a dodgy underground bar. We had time to have a drink there before meeting Donna and her Tokyo friends.

I kinda felt like the fifth wheel during that dinner, but I prefered being single rather then being stuck with someone as lame as these 2 guys. Anyway, Donna and her friends decided to go to the Hard Rock Cafe for some good old American dining. I didn't eat since I had dinner already, but thank god for that, because the small italien salad was nearly $18. Soon after their dinner it was time to hit the sleazy Roppongi bars.

We stayed out the whole evening and the whole night until the sun came up. We had a Turkish Kabob before taking the first morning train to Chiba to crash at one of Donna's friends. At 3pm, we woke up and dreamt of a western breakfast that was impossible to find anywhere on our way back to downtown Tokyo. I had a massive hungover which resulted from mixing way too many alcoholic drinks. I felt like I was runover by a tank, but I was happy not to be the only feeling out of it. We finally hit an Irish Pub for dinner before getting on the Shinkansen back to rural Fukushima.

All that time bar-hopping through Roppongi, I felt like one of these girls on Girls Gone Wild. I am still waiting for this picture of this one bartender shooting out flames from his mouth accross the bar. Unbelievable... Did this all really happen?

I hope this is just one Tokyo experience of many more to come. I am nonetheless very grateful to live in a smaller town away from such madness. It is so quiet here. Before visiting Tokyo I was already criticizing Japan for its unbearable noise pollution and sensory overload, and Fukushima was just a sample of what I experienced this last week-end.

e.

Tokyo Posting Coming Very Soon!

To all of you who are anticipating my posting on my week-end in Tokyo, I promise that it will be up by tomorrow. All I can say right now is, "wow" and why did I have to wait so long to go... Its been two days since my return and I am still recovering. Talk about sensory overload!

Meanwhile, you can always listen to Gogol Bordello's Start Wearing Purple.

Take care for now,
e.

Here is some more information that I found about valentine's day in Japan...
I thought maybe some of you would be interested.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/4712542.stm

toorloo,
e.

You Oughta Know...

My anti-valentine's day night out was succesfully wrapped by the unison of our raging voices on Alanis Morrisette's You Oughta Know.
Sure this must all sound like we were a bunch of angry chics bashing men all night... but honestly, it was more like a sort of night to celebrate our new friendships and celibacy. In 6 years I have never spent a valentine's day alone and I thought that was something to celebrate. Sure, we all sorta revisited our past relationships, but at the end of the day, guess what? There is nothing to be bummed out about! We are all in Japan, living the most amazing experience of our lives that no boy could ever give us! So, celibacy? yes please! I dont need anything to anchor me. Not just yet. I know the day will come, but what matters most right now is me and sorting myself out. So basically, I don't need anything getting in my way.

The girls (Leslee, Donna, Diane, Michelle, Akiko) and I all met after work at this nice Italien restaurant at the station called Ducca.

We had good food, good wine and good conversations, from tanctric sex, to crazy ex-boyfriend dreams. It was just great to think that this dreadful day gave us an excuse to spend a great night together without the boys.

After stuffing our faces with pizza and other Japanese renditions of Italien dishes, we decided to end the night at our favourite Karaoke place. This time around, it wasnt about who had the best singing voice, but who had the best dance moves.

We sang and danced for 2 hours to Get Busy, Pour some Sugar on Me, Sweet Child o'Mine, a Britney Spears medley and some Fitty toons. It was magical!

For a foreigner like myself, Valentine's Day in Japan is very different. First of all, women are supposed to give men chocolates. They also have to bake them a cake, and if they buy it, it brings bad luck into the relationship. Japanese people are very suspicious. Well I really cant see how much worse their relationships can get, they all seem pretty hopeless already. Anyway, Valentine's day is a day like any other. It's not like you see more people kissing or holding hands. Japan still remains the most impassionate country on earth. Men get chocolates and eat cake, period.

Then in March, women get their day called White Day. On that day, men give women something in return. So that means I have to suffer through 2 valentine's day: my own and the japanese kind. Hopefully, this will give me and my girls another excuse to spend a night out.

On another note, there is this couple in Shanghai who for the sake of Valentine's day, is getting plastic surgery to have matching noses. When did love take such a wrong turn?

This week-end I decided to go to Tokyo... finally. I am taking the bus early saturday morning and will tour the city before meeting my friend Donna and her sister for some partying on Roppongi Hills. Ill be back on Sunday night and will make sure to tell you all about my crazy Tokyo experience.

much love on v-day,

e.

The very first restaurant I tried when I arrived in Japan was a gioza shop. One night after a day of training, my co-worker, Dave, took me to this tiny little restaurant hidden in a dark Fukushima alley. The low sliding door opened up to a bar sort of place that smelt like frying oil and garlic. The air was smokey and the decor was grim and busy, but the gioza were like little pockets of heaven. Almost, every week since then I have been to the gioza lady, who is, although almost deaf, the sweetest lady. I think her geijin clientel has trippled since my arrival in Fukushima. I guess gioza is the Japanese equivalent to the tapas that Heidi always raves about. And why would I not keep on going back? It's cheap, its yummy and the sweet gioza lady always likes to offer us free food.

Last Monday night, my friend Michelle and I decided to have a quiet dinner at the gioza place before going back home for an early night. But much to our surprise we ended up spending the whole evening out until 1am.

I was the first one to arrive and I had to wait for Michelle a few minutes. I didnt quite know how to tell the gioza lady that I had another friend coming... so I was a little embarassed by my little Japanese in front of these Japanese businessmen that had just taken a seat next to me. They opened a bottle of beer and offered me some. At first I declined, but since they insisted I just couldnt refuse. They asked me a few simple questions and with the little Japanese I knew, I tried to awnser the best I could. Then Michelle finally arrived and cut the awkwardness. Michelle's Japanese is 10 times better then mine, so the conversation became a little easier. They also started to serve us more and more beer. It didnt take too long for them to get drunk and start being a little bit more friendly. I can't use the word flirt, because that is not what they do. I can't really explain. I guess Japanese people are just more social then usual when they drink. Then I noticed that 2 of the 4 men that gave me and Michelle the most attention were married. After 10 huge bottles of beer (Japanese bottles of beer are as big as wine bottles) and a giant bottle of sake, their dopey behaviour caused me to throw a few funny one-liners in their face knowing that they would not understand. At this point, we found our situation so ludicrous that we decided to stay with the men a little longer and see what would happen next. We knew that something like this was rare and that we should just sit back and enjoy the ride. Besides, the alcohol was free and I was practicing my Japanese.

After dinner, they invited us to go to another bar with them for more free drinks. On our stumbly walk across the city, I had to remind the married man a few times that he was married, but then he invited me to his house to try some of his wife's cooking. How bizarre is that? Anyway, after giving Michelle a chance to pick up the good-looking single one and seeing another one fall off his bar stool, we decided to leave to our next destination: Karaoke. I sang my usual show tunes, Heart of Glass and Eternal Flame. They sang their usual Japanese songs mixed with some Queen and White Snake.... A few times I would have a microphone fly straight into my face as they were dancing on top of the couches. They paid for us yet again and wanted us to join them for the next bar, but it was already 1am and we had work the next day. So, Michelle and I thought that it would be much wiser to head back home.



On our sobering walk home, we were bewildered by the evening's turn of events. We didnt quite know what to think of it all. She was somewhat happy about exchanging numbers with the single good-looking one, but my evening wasnt about picking up. I basically sat back and observed. We also realized that we didnt even know their names.. we only had terrible nicknames for all four of them: Tom Cruise, ArmyPants, Nori and Nabe (a japanese dish). Anyway, what was important for me that evening was to give these men a good impression of foreigners. We weren't easy, but we were fun and respectable. The next morning I started thinking about the big picture and realized that this was all very typical of Japanese society. While the wives were at home with the children, their husbands were gallivanting around town bar hopping completly drunk trying to pick up younger women. I just hated thinking about this, but then I realized how I had just lived a huge cultural experience. I was actually observing and experiencing their lifestyle and that was more enlightning then visiting a Japanese touristic site or eating Japanese food. I think if you really experience the people's culture and their way of life then you can really understand... I could read books my entire life about Japanese culture and society, but that night made me understand a little better about how it is really like to be Japanese. I think its the people that matter the most.

Curry or not, here I come!

I think I have been watching too many episodes of Lost in the last few days. I woke up this morning with claw marks in my winter boots. And if John Locke (a character in Lost for the ones who don't know) was here he would probably agree that they came from a bear. What else could have teared my tenacious rugged suede boots? So, I started off my week this morning by seeing my favourite pair of boots totally ripped in the back by what I suspect was a bear attack. So if it is possible to bring polar bears to life out from my TV set, I wonder if it can do the same with Matthew Fox. Oh Jack, you can rip my boots open anytime!

Other than wishing for Jack to crawl out from my TV set, life in Fukushima has been making me feel somewhat restless. Well first of all, it has been cold and snowing here almost everyday for the last 2 weeks. But I am also really excited for April because my brother and my mother are coming and then in May, I am going to have a new roomate live with me and my new polar bear friends! Rachel has decided to come and live with me in Japan until the end of my contract. This could not have happened at a better time because many of my friends are going back home in April, including Diane. It's a reassuring feeling that I am not going to be alone when all of my friends leave Japan.

I have been pressured to write a new entry, but I really dont have much to talk about! Tomorrow I am going to the travel agency to inquire about plane tickets to Thailand for when my mother comes. I will also be looking into a week-end in Hiroshima for when my brother is here. On my free time I have been basically trying to create a perfect itinerary for when my family visits.

Saturday night, I was invited to my friend Yassu's house for a curry party. It was like some sort of curry pot lock. I made my curry from scratch and I was very pleased with the result. Anyway, it was a great evening and very different to any other parties I have been to in Japan so far. If you remember, Yassu is my overtly gay friend who is really wild and fairy-like. After a calm sit-down dinner, Yassu's living room turned into a gay dance club when he put on some dance music that reminded him of his wild university days in Tokyo. He pressured me to show him some belly-dancing moves and we started making up a choreography for Don't Call me Baby and Down, Down, Down. If the titles dont ring a bell, I can guaranty you have heard these songs a million times in the year of 2000. Needless to say, a flamboyant gay man and House music topped up with a little wine made was a recipe for an interesting evening. It was only at 5am that we left yassu's house filled with curry and all gayed out.

Yesterday, after watching a few more Lost episodes, Yassu and I went to Sendai for dinner at this very nice Italien restaurant, called Mia Angela (I know there is really no use for any of you to know the name of the restaurant, but it is for my own reference and Rachel's for when she comes live here.) I found it very amusing when the whole restaurant staff including the cook (muffled by the steam in the kitchen) greeted me and Yassu one by one. I never felt so exposed entering a restaurant before, and of course my graceful self had to trip over the carpet fringes as Yassu and I were being escorted to our table. If being white was not bad enough, I also had to be deadly clumsy! So after fighting off the curious stares with a loud embarassed giggle, we sat down to enjoy the service of an English speaking waitress (which is always great!)

I got back from Sendai by Shinkansen because I didnt want to be late for a meeting with a student (which I will never do again because I wasted $20 to save only 40 minutes of my time). Then I met some friends for some Karaoke for a good-bye party for my friend Jax going back to Australia. I was really on my game last night without even being drunk! I usually sing better, or sound better after a few drinks. I am no Witney Houston, but I dont think I am terrible either. I managed to be in bed by 1am and woke up 7 hours later to find my boots ravaged by a polar bear. No, but seriously I have no idea what the hell could have done this to my boots! Any ideas anyone?

I finally found a way to put on titles!! (not to be confused with titties)

Bang! Bang! Bang! Goes the hammers in my backyard... since the day I arrived in this country, they have been building this house next door. Japan is the country of construction. They are always mending streets, renovating, putting down, rebuilding... There's a constant sound of hammering or drilling in the background. This could lead one to think that Japan is maybe not westernising, but modernising *ponder*. I think the funniest part of it all are the people hired to direct the traffic on a construction site. It only takes a small hole in the ground to have at least 5 construction workers flaring their Star Wars sticks in the air to tell us where to go. After the first waving glowing stick, I think we got the message, domo arigato!

Sorry for taking so long to update. I have been very busy with work and friends since my return. I can't wait for next week-end to rest and sleep-in.

On my first week-end back I had a phone call on Sunday morning at 8am from my Canadian friend Leslee in tears. She had locked her back that morning when she was putting on her socks, had fallen to her bed and could not move. So right away I put on the clothes that was on my floor and powerwalked to her apartment. When I got there, I saw her laying there with half of her body on her futon and the other half on the floor. I had no idea what to do. She was in pain and she couldnt move an inch. Finally, her friend Ayako came and we thought it was best to call the ambulance. The rest of the day was spent at the hospital trying to comfort her and doing some errands for her, since she was going to be staying at the hospital for a few nights because of a slipped disc. I couldnt imagine myself in her situation. I dont know how I would have felt if I had to be in the hospital in a foreign country away from my family. So it was important for me to be there for her and to make sure she gets all the support she needs. There was not one instant at the hospital when friends werent by her side (until bed time at 9pm - right.) They all brought her some food and get well gifts. I thought of loading her up with porn and beer (the pure essentials), but surprisingly these things went against the doctor's orders. Instead, we brought her origami...

On that same night I had to go to my friend Rio's surpise party after making 2 giant towers of cocktail sandwiches. I dont remember making the sandwiches between the hospital and getting to the party. It all happened so fast... But in an hour I had time to take a shower, get ready and prepare 18 sandwiches. Go me! I know that there are pictures of these sandwiches somewhere. Ill have to ask my friend Jason to pass them on to me.

Last week-end I had to work on Saturday. Every 2 months my school hosts this English Intensive Week-end, where a few students go for this week-end homestay at my boss's house up in the mountains. His house is very much western style and so the idea is to create a sort of an English western/european experience. The biggest challenge was to make them speak English, but we played games (remember frozen tag and "what time is it Mr. Wolf?"), baked "hide and seek muffins," and filled out many english work sheets.

On the next day, my apartment was desperate for some cleaning, so I put on my new Madonna CD on and put my butt into it. Now if only I could keep it this tidy and clean. Later that afternoon, my friend Diane and I went for some afternoon karaoke and sang to tunes such as Lady Marmalde and Shampoo's Trouble (remember that one???) - For next time, I'm thinking a Tiffany song like I Think We're Alone Now. Then Diane made us dinner that we ate along 2 bottles of red wine... I was actually feeling fine for work the next day, but my co-workers wanted to know what I did in the week-end. When I told one of them that me and my friend finished two bottles of red wine she asked me if red wine made you pee purple...... no joke. There are 2 types of japanese here: the alcoholics and the ones that know absolutly nothing about alcohol.

I think the most exciting night here since Ive been back from Canada was last night. First my friend Michelle and I went out for dinner at this fast food sushi place. If you havent seen Lost in Translation, in these restaurants you have sushi going around in rotation in front of you and you just pick and choose the sushi that you want. For dessert I had a craving for soft vanilla ice cream. Have you ever had ice cream on an ice cream stand before? I have!

We went bowling at this new GIGANTIC entertainment complex that just opened in Fukushima. I dont know how long this place is going to last because I think there is enough people living in Fukushima to fill the 2 first floors of the building. But it's big, it's loud and it's flashy: everything the Japanese long for. At Round One the world is your oyster! You can go Karaoke, play arcade games, roller-skate, play squash, play bowling, ride a bull and even go fishing!

Anyway, although I am the world's lousiest bowler, I had a great time. Here is an advertisement of the Round One grand opening in the tunnel passing under the Fukushima train station. At first, I took the picture because the woman made me thinks of my friend Diane. Hope she doesnt mind I put this up... haha.I had my friend Yassu in my team, who I like to compare to a fairy. He is a very very gay man, who I love and deeply respect. It is incredibly rare to see a gay man in the open in such a small town as Fukushima, so it was very refreshing to be around someone that is so open about his sexuality in such a subdued environment. He's one of Diane's English students and I think (I think) he is a drag queen on his days off. Simply watching him bowl was a like a scene taken right out of The Birdcage. It was also my first time getting hit on by a japanese man (who has a girlfriend). I wonder if its the novelty of going out with a white girl attracts some of the men here. Nonetheless, it is very very rare to have a Japanese man compliment you or flirt with you, so I didnt quite know how to react, especially when I knew that he had a girlfriend. Bummer, because he is somewhat cute... But I still dont think I dig the japanese in that kind of way. I have also noticed that Japanese men are mostly unfaithful, therefore another reason not to get involved with them. Anyway, here is a picture of my friends (Rio, Takahiro and Ryuta) trying on these great bowling Pin costumes, another great amusement offered at Round One.

And here is the whole group:
Also, I am very excited of having my brother coming to see me in April for two weeks. I'm not quite sure what we will be doing when he comes down, but I'm thinking climbing up Mt Fuji and spending a week-end in Tokyo. Other than that, I am sure that while I'm at work he wont mind using his rail pass to go around Japan by bullet train (something which Canada should really start looking into - imagine riding the train 50 minutes to go to Montreal from Toronto, for an affordable price.) Jordan, who I also like to call my human map, will have no problem finding its way through the streets with no name (a quirky U2 reference for Rachel, Heidi and Shane - voila!) For some who don't know, my mom is also coming in May for 3 weeks and we are thinking of travelling to Thailand or VietNam for 4 or 5 days. All of my students want to meet my family and so it seems like I will have to have a "bring your parents to work week." When I told my class at the community center that I was thinking of having my mom come for a class they all started applauding. So mom, I wouldnt want to dissapoint... would you be game? they are a tough crowd. They'll scrutinize you and stare at you the whole time. No joke.

This is for you mom... Capuccino avec son lait et sa mousse.. une chance!

On top of that, Miss Rachel West is seriously thinking of coming to Japan for 3 or 4 months and live with yours truly until the end of my contract. But that is all I am going to say until I know for sure. I don't want to get all excited just now, because I can just imagine the mad time we would have in Japan in the summer together.

Winter in Japan has been very unusual. Its been snowing almost everyday since I've been back. The roads are icy and covered in snow. It's also colder than normal and the worse has yet to come: February... Brrr... Just to tell you all how cold it is in my apartment, a few days ago I took a bath and I could feel the cold brisk air through the hot boiling water. No joke.

Heidi, today I was correcting some of my student's crosswords and this one puzzle was called Heidi, intitled after the television show. I will have to make some copies!

And to my friends who have been expecting postcards. I bought the postcards and I know that you will all enjoy them... but they were so funny that i thought of bringing them to my class tomorrow morning. I will try to have them sent out by next week. Shane I will wait till you are in Australia, just in case.

I have to go back to school and teach my last class. Hope all is well with everyone. There has been a wave of people coming in and out of Toronto such as Mairin and Natalie. I really wish I could have been there to join the fun.

de yuskette, (take care)
e.

I thought that maybe some of you could find this article interesting.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/4594782.stm

enjoy!
e.

P.S. An Izakaya is like a snack bar that Japanese people go to after the bars. Bars are only supposed to serve alcohol until a certain time, but even though Izakayas also serve alcohol, their connotation as a snack place make them different to bars, and make them therefore legal. Japanese people love to drink!

It took 25 hours to finally arrive to my Fukushima apartment and only seconds to make my few days in Canada seem like a dream.

Waking up to the CN Tower on my first few days at home was completly surreal. Thinking that I was in Japan just days ago didn't make any sense to me. How could I be on one face of the world on one day, and on the other the next?

I left Japan the 27th of December at 2:10pm and arrived in Toronto on the same day just 3 hours later. So my 12 hour plane ride was in fact only 3 hours. Jet lag was very difficult to get over in my first days. I was worried that I would only get over my jetlag on time to go back. Everynight I would go to bed and lay there trying very hard to fall asleep. Sometimes it took hours... And to think that I once could sleep anytime anywhere.

But this trip was not only about getting over jet lag and time difference... It was a time for me to recharge my batteries, see the people I love and eat beef! (thanx mom for providing me with beef almost everyday I was home!)

Going back home was like a reversal culture shock. It felt strange to see so many white people, to be able to communicate in English and to stop being so damn polite. When I was in transit in Detroit, the differences between the 2 cultures were drastic! I went from the calm and submissive Japanese to the abbressive and loud Americans. It was actually somewhat refreshing to see people getting mad over nothing or being vulgar; two things Japanese people avoid. Let's just say that people in North America have a little bit more character than the Japanese. People at the Detroit airport were so rude to me! It was great!

At my arrival I was greeted by my mother, and surprised by my brother. I didn't expect to see him at the airport because he was supposed to be at work. I got a little emotional when I saw him. He changed so much since I left. I guess that is what college does to 18 year old boys. So of course I had my little public cry at the aiport, gave the crowd a little show and walked out of the airport with my dignity into the mean streets of Toronto.

Right at my arrival I was struck by the news that a 15 year old girl was accidently shot during a day-light shooting between two gangs at one of the busiest intersections of Toronto. I thought of how lucky I was to be in Japan safe and far away from that sort of violence. It is very rare to hear about any sort of criminal acts in Japan. Also, Japanese people share a common trust for eachother. Like for example, many shops leave their marchandise outside their stores overnight. When I do my groceries, I leave all of my things in my bike basket to go in the next shop knowing that no one will even think of taking them. I walk alone from bars in the middle of the night and I sleep with my doors unlocked. I could never think of doing that in Canada.

My first few days in Toronto were spent with my mother. We went shopping, got spoiled, went to the movies and did the usual errands. But even grocery shopping was nice. It was great to recognize all the products and to be able to buy other things then just fish and sushi. There are so many kinds of fish you can try before realizing that almost all fish taste the same.

On my 3rd day I got to see Rachel and Rusty for drinks. This is when the question "Sooo... how's Japan?" made me realize how hard it was the explain my Japanese experience. I had no other other words, than just "crazy." I didn't know where to start. I knew that my last 4 months had changed me and opened my mind, but I could never make anyone understand a country such as Japan until they come and see it for themselves. Japan needs to be experienced in order to be understood (although I dont think Japan can ever be fully understood as a foreigner.) People kept on asking me this question, and everytime I had no idea how to respond. I actually started hating finding an answer to this question. All I had to say about Japan was in form of anecdotes, funny stories and an observations. I thaught everyone a few Japanese words, told them how I got through my first big earthquake, confirmed that there are Japanese people that are taller than me and that it actually snows over there.

It was crucial that I go out dancing as soon as possible. So on my first Friday night, Rachel, Rusty, Shane and myself went to the Dance Cave. Last summer I remember going to Zaphods almost twice a week and loved it. Ive only been dancing in Japan once. That Friday night is when I realized how Japanese men absolutly do not flirt or look at girls. It was strange to receive any sort of attention from the opposite sex when I was in Canada. I also realized how picky I have become in choosing a man. "Man" being the keyword here. Ive also realized that I will be single for a long time, because I am not at all attracted to Japanese men and foreign men usually come to Japan to get a Japanese girl. Not that I am complaining to be honest.






Then there was New Year's Eve. Like I said in my previous entry, I really had no clue what we would be doing for New Year's Eve. At the last minute we decided to go to this place called My Apartment in downtown Toronto that would accommodate my mom and my friends alike. We danced all night to 90s dance music, like Max A Million's "Hey Fatboy," and The Outhere Brothers' "Boom Boom Boom."

This was my first time at a club with my mother, and she didnt cramp my style as much as I thought she would (just kidding mum), but she would laugh at everything I would do (as seen in this picture.) I wonder if that's a good thing... Looking ridiculous on the dance floor can only be funny for so long.. ha. Crazy how much I look like my mother.

And then there was this one guy after midnight who for the sake of entertaining me started blowing out of two kazoos at once as he was Zorba dancing. He was so ridiculous; I couldnt stop laughing, urging me to have a coughing attack on the dance floor. After midnight, the 90s music took a turn from good to lame, so we decided to leave. We took a taxi back home, and just when my mother was telling Rachel that she didnt like Beck taxis, we had an accident with a school bus. I dont really know what happened, but I know that it wasnt our taxi driver's fault. Either way, the driver started scaring us because he didnt want us to leave the cab so that we could be his witnesses when the cops came. He kept on saying, "I saved your life! You could have been killed.." That was enough for Rachel to throw 10 bucks in his face and get into another taxi to finally make it home alive. Hopefully, this does not announce the coming of a bad year. Last year was not the most incredible year of my life! I wouldn't want to start 2006 on a bad foot.

On the second day of the year I had Jessica, my one and only mass comm essay writing partner who I love dearly, visit me for 2 days. It was so great to see her again! I just couldnt believe that she came down all the way to see me... I can only guess that I must have done something right along the way of our friendship. So her visit was in fact very flattering... Thank you Jess. I hope you had a nice stay! "I think there is a big band playing tonight." There sure was... :) Also thank you for putting up with my CD purchasing obssession. It is nice to be in possession of new CDs. Cds are so expensive in Japan and the good ones are much harder to find, unless I go in a big city, so needless to say I went nuts when I was in Toronto. And which CDs did I purchase you might ask yourself? Well I was given Death From Above, the newest Broken Social Scene (which is stellar by the way), the newest Madonna (great music for when it is time to clean my apartment) and I bought CDs by The shins, Sufjan Stevens, Spoon, Metric, Death Cab for Cutie and the first Arcade Fire. I wonder if I'm forgetting anything... anyway, I could I swear that the CDs were the reason for my overweight luggage. Damn music addiction...

I also went to Montreal for a few days to see my family and meet some of my friends. Again the question "Sooo.. how's Japan?" sprung up again... still scavenging for an answer, I simply repeated the same anecdotes ive already been telling everyone for a week. So after being repeatedly interrogated by my grand-pa about life in Japan, I think I gave my family a pretty good idea of what japan is like, or somewhat. My family was very close to taking me to a Japanese restaurant, but I raised my flag early enough to have my family realize that maybe sushi was the last thing I wanted to ingest at this point. So I was lucky enough to be taken to 2 very nice restaurants that did not involve rice or chopsticks. On my second night I saw Melissa and we spent the evening chatting away about everything and of course, Japan (it was the only think I could converse about.) We also rented this great French Canadian movie CRAZY, which I definetly suggest everyone to see.

Walking through the streets of downtown Montreal I was debating some more on weither it was where I would like to live after Japan. Everyday, so many more options come to mind (I even thought of starting acting school believe it or not), but Montreal still remains my final destination. I am pretty sure that when I go home, I will travel for a bit, take this Cinema Marketing course at Ryerson with Rachel, find myself a small job in Toronto for a year, and slowly make my way to Montreal, where I will hopefully find something stable. I guess all of this seems pretty realistic. I think... other than maybe the acting class.

On my way back from Montreal I met up with Rachel for some quick last minute shopping and dinner before going back for my last night at the Dance Cave. Before hitting the bar, it was important for us to start drinking early. So since the Pickel Barrel did not offer beer pitchers, we decided to order the next best thing: half yards of beer.

I never thought half-yards of beer could get one so tipsy. I really should watch he volume of my voice when I criticize other people's fashion. Wow, do I ever hate these furry boots!!

After having Shane meeting us for one last beer (in a bottle this time), we made our way to the dance cave, looking for a guy that could give me one last kiss before I go back to stone cold Japan. Thats all I am going to say, since my family is reading this. But try to tell a stranger that you live in Japan, I can guaranty you that they will think you are taking them for a fool!

I would like to thank my mom for sharing me with my friends during my stay in Canada. It was nice to see you guys.. I always have so much fun with all of you. I will miss you all very very much! Rachel, if you can find a way to Japan, I would be forever greatful! xx Also I regret that I had to leave before Mairin and Natalie's visit. By the way, I cant believe you guys went Karaoke without me?? Were you scared that I would steal the show because I have been practicing so much?

On my last day in Canada, I wanted to relax at home with my family, which I did. I just lounged around watching television and spent some quality time with my brother (who I hope will find the time to see me in Japan - it will be a free trip for him afterall, since I am the best sister in the world!). I packed my suitcase at the very last minute of course, because I didnt want to face the fact that it was already time to go back. It was the fastest 12 days of my life, but I had a great time and now I am ready to face the rest of my months in this crazy country.

Going back to work yesterday morning was nice. I actually missed my kids and my older students a great deal. I have to say that they really make my Japanese experience worthwhile and add a little something that wouldnt be possible if I was only travelling. Sure they make the job difficult at times, but thats just like everything else.

So here you have it! Thank you for everyone that have made this trip so wonderful. I am blessed to have you all in my life.

e.

** All photographs courtesy of Rachel West. :) Domo arigato!